real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
