Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Small penises have feelings too.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
