I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
