Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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