k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My liver is preforming stress tests.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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