No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
