I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Randomize
