I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
