I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
one might say we're banned from that church
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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