i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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