Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
