Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
