Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
