You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
There's always time for handjobs
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
