In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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