like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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