Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize