I can tuck mytits in my pants
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
