Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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