I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
