put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
