I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
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