Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
