i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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