He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
