Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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