we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
