I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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