Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize