guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
