the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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