Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
