Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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