Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
high people should be assigned attendants
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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