i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
