everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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