Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize