I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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