im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
