If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
