Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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