I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
