I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
