how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
