How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I touched a dick in church today
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Randomize
