I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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