The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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