Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I just gift wrapped bread.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Randomize
