I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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