I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I think people are normalizing furries
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
