Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
