the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
